Parent-prof conferences don't foster self-governance; students patronized
Joseph McCleary
Issue date: 10/25/07 Section: Opinion
Even high school wasn't this bad: parents sitting down with each instructor, discussing that C on your last test, your progress, and your missing assignments.
I appreciate that Hillsdale College is different from other colleges, including added parent participation in the education process. But it extends too far with the Parent/Faculty conferences over Parent Weekend. I felt like I was in 4th Grade all over again.
The Parent/Faculty conferences can serve two purposes. For some parents, it serves as a meet-and-greet session to satisfy their curiosity about what your professors are like. For other parents, it is an information session on the finer details of your academic progress.
Depending on what they want to hear, professors share your test grades, quality of work, missing assignments, and even actions the parent can take to help you improve.
This interference is not healthy for the parents and student.
At some point in a child's life, parents have to let go of details of their children's schoolwork. Parents must let their children take their education into their own hands and let them learn from their own decisions and mistakes. Parent/Faculty conferences are not helping this process. On the contrary, Parent/Faculty conferences are inhibiting student growth and independence.
In the United States, the traditional age of self-governance is college. It is a period in life when young adults take schoolwork into their own hands, make mistakes, but learn from them all the while. Even though mistakes will be made, it is still necessary to prepare students for the transition into the real world and the work world, where a boss won't sit down with Mom- and, more than likely, will never meet her.
A typical argument I've heard in support of Parent/Faculty conferences is: "Your parents are paying for your education; they are entitled to know how you're doing."
I agree. If they are paying for your tuition (which isn't always the case), they should be entitled to see your grade in the course, but nothing more. Anything more than that is babying the student, which helps neither the parents nor student. Instead, the professors disclosure of privileged material- late assignments, poor tests, etc.- stifles the 18-year-old's self-governance and fosters an unhealthy reliance on the parent.
Another argument I've heard is: "There are many parents at Hillsdale who are super-involved in their child's education, including some homeschool parents. These parents must know the details of their children's academics."
So be it. Hillsdale College has a disproportionate number of over-involved parents. They must be weaned from their child's schoolwork just like any other parents. Letting go of a college-aged student is a natural and healthy phase of the parenting process. (Plus, we've all seen what happens to children when parents don't let go.)
Additionally, students must learn to discuss their academic problems one-on-one with the professor without parental help, much like they will soon do with a future boss.
If parents have trained their child well, he or she will do fine at Hillsdale College- regardless of Mom and Dad knowing their every academic move.
A New Proposition
Instead of Parent/Faculty Conferences, I propose a replacement event called the Parent/Student/Faculty Meet and Greet.
During the Saturday morning, professors would have office hours where students can usher their parents around to meet their professors.
Students would introduce their parents to professors like adults meeting adults.
(Which is what they are.)
If the parents and student choose, they could talk about the student's progress, or lack thereof, together. But none of this parent-teacher conferencing that smacks of elementary school and talking behind the student's back.
Another benefit of this set-up is the recognition of the student's entry into adulthood. By ushering the parents around, the students will gain a greater understanding that they are in charge of their own lives and education.
Additionally, it would teach the students to incorporate their parents into their adult work lives-something most parents would like. So this set-up will benefit all parties.
Finally, this set-up would stop that all-too-common questioning after Parent/Faculty conferences: "What did my profs say about me?"
I appreciate that Hillsdale College is different from other colleges, including added parent participation in the education process. But it extends too far with the Parent/Faculty conferences over Parent Weekend. I felt like I was in 4th Grade all over again.
The Parent/Faculty conferences can serve two purposes. For some parents, it serves as a meet-and-greet session to satisfy their curiosity about what your professors are like. For other parents, it is an information session on the finer details of your academic progress.
Depending on what they want to hear, professors share your test grades, quality of work, missing assignments, and even actions the parent can take to help you improve.
This interference is not healthy for the parents and student.
At some point in a child's life, parents have to let go of details of their children's schoolwork. Parents must let their children take their education into their own hands and let them learn from their own decisions and mistakes. Parent/Faculty conferences are not helping this process. On the contrary, Parent/Faculty conferences are inhibiting student growth and independence.
In the United States, the traditional age of self-governance is college. It is a period in life when young adults take schoolwork into their own hands, make mistakes, but learn from them all the while. Even though mistakes will be made, it is still necessary to prepare students for the transition into the real world and the work world, where a boss won't sit down with Mom- and, more than likely, will never meet her.
A typical argument I've heard in support of Parent/Faculty conferences is: "Your parents are paying for your education; they are entitled to know how you're doing."
I agree. If they are paying for your tuition (which isn't always the case), they should be entitled to see your grade in the course, but nothing more. Anything more than that is babying the student, which helps neither the parents nor student. Instead, the professors disclosure of privileged material- late assignments, poor tests, etc.- stifles the 18-year-old's self-governance and fosters an unhealthy reliance on the parent.
Another argument I've heard is: "There are many parents at Hillsdale who are super-involved in their child's education, including some homeschool parents. These parents must know the details of their children's academics."
So be it. Hillsdale College has a disproportionate number of over-involved parents. They must be weaned from their child's schoolwork just like any other parents. Letting go of a college-aged student is a natural and healthy phase of the parenting process. (Plus, we've all seen what happens to children when parents don't let go.)
Additionally, students must learn to discuss their academic problems one-on-one with the professor without parental help, much like they will soon do with a future boss.
If parents have trained their child well, he or she will do fine at Hillsdale College- regardless of Mom and Dad knowing their every academic move.
A New Proposition
Instead of Parent/Faculty Conferences, I propose a replacement event called the Parent/Student/Faculty Meet and Greet.
During the Saturday morning, professors would have office hours where students can usher their parents around to meet their professors.
Students would introduce their parents to professors like adults meeting adults.
(Which is what they are.)
If the parents and student choose, they could talk about the student's progress, or lack thereof, together. But none of this parent-teacher conferencing that smacks of elementary school and talking behind the student's back.
Another benefit of this set-up is the recognition of the student's entry into adulthood. By ushering the parents around, the students will gain a greater understanding that they are in charge of their own lives and education.
Additionally, it would teach the students to incorporate their parents into their adult work lives-something most parents would like. So this set-up will benefit all parties.
Finally, this set-up would stop that all-too-common questioning after Parent/Faculty conferences: "What did my profs say about me?"
Viewing Comments 1 - 1 of 1
Diane Poythress
posted 10/30/07 @ 3:42 AM EST
As the parent of a Hillsdale senior, I would like to offer a different perspective on the parent/prof conferences. In my seven conferences attended, never have I had a discussion with a professor that looked like what Mr. (Continued…)
Post a Comment