Following friends to college
Joy Pavelski
Issue date: 9/6/07 Section: Features
A "smiling moment" is something sophomore Shannon McCleary can only share with her best friend. It occurs when there is little to say but much to grin about. Then the two girls look at each other, understanding each other's contentment without words.
McCleary said having her best friend come to Hillsdale College was serendipity.
"Through the years we'd say to each other,
'That would be so perfect to be at the same [college],'" McCleary said. "But we never thought it would happen."
Horror stories abound of high school relationships ruined when friends attend college together.
Some say people change so much at college that it's not practical for students to expect their old friendships to stay the same.
Others worry that naturally shy students will cocoon themselves in the comfort of old friends rather than expanding their circle of experiences with new relationships.
"It's an easier transition knowing people at school," said freshman Amy Papritz, who met several other current students on Hillsdale College's Sir Winston Churchill high school study abroad trip. "But I'm outgoing as it is, so I would have been fine either way."
Kathy Nestorak's two children attend Hillsdale. They both enrolled with several high school friends. She encouraged her daughter, Reneé, now a sophomore, to room with a stranger instead of someone she already knew.
"We were worried that the familiarity you've established with an old friend would keep you from being on your best behavior with them as a roommate," Nestorak said.
"You're more likely to keep your things neat and be polite if you want to make a good impression on someone you don't know."
Students said bringing an old friend to a new school has its own problems and rewards.
Relationships, like many other things, change at college.
Some friends work to accommodate those changes-setting aside specific times to see each other, welcoming new people into their social circles, ignoring hair that has suddenly turned pink or an unexpected affinity for loud parties.
McCleary said having her best friend come to Hillsdale College was serendipity.
"Through the years we'd say to each other,
'That would be so perfect to be at the same [college],'" McCleary said. "But we never thought it would happen."
Horror stories abound of high school relationships ruined when friends attend college together.
Some say people change so much at college that it's not practical for students to expect their old friendships to stay the same.
Others worry that naturally shy students will cocoon themselves in the comfort of old friends rather than expanding their circle of experiences with new relationships.
"It's an easier transition knowing people at school," said freshman Amy Papritz, who met several other current students on Hillsdale College's Sir Winston Churchill high school study abroad trip. "But I'm outgoing as it is, so I would have been fine either way."
Kathy Nestorak's two children attend Hillsdale. They both enrolled with several high school friends. She encouraged her daughter, Reneé, now a sophomore, to room with a stranger instead of someone she already knew.
"We were worried that the familiarity you've established with an old friend would keep you from being on your best behavior with them as a roommate," Nestorak said.
"You're more likely to keep your things neat and be polite if you want to make a good impression on someone you don't know."
Students said bringing an old friend to a new school has its own problems and rewards.
Relationships, like many other things, change at college.
Some friends work to accommodate those changes-setting aside specific times to see each other, welcoming new people into their social circles, ignoring hair that has suddenly turned pink or an unexpected affinity for loud parties.

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